Proust Questionnaire! Today's Special Guest: Jessica Leader

The Proust Questionnaire is back, without a day in its title, because that is how my blogging rolls right now.  After this, I have one more author's answers, and the Questionnaire will go on hiatus indefinitely.  S'all good.

Jessica Leader has a fabbity fab website where I learned the wonderful fact that bees have feet.  I wish all websites had facts like that laying about.  We would all be better off for it.  Jessica likes being in school, it seems, whether that means taking or teaching courses on writing.  Her first novel, NICE AND MEAN, comes out this June.  She is running her first ARC giveaway on her blog (www.jessicaleader.com/blog), where people can also win other books and bookmarks.Visit her at www.jessicaleader.com.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Jessica Leader!

1. What is your favorite word? "Yank." I would use it in every scene I wrote if nobody noticed. Also, "Marvy."
2. What is your least favorite word? "Precious." Barf.
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Unalike people coming together.
4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Lack of curiosity.
5. What sound or noise do you love? My wedding present seltzer maker making seltzer just for me.
6. What sound or noise do you hate? Wedding present pots and pans, scraping against each other. They're like a blessing and a curse.
7. What is your favorite curse word? The Sh word. It's concise.
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Olympic gymnast, now and forever.
9. What profession would you not like to do? Anything that involves telling people to turn down their music. I falter. I cringe.
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? "You were right! You were right about almost everything!"

Next week's author: Jessica Verday!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Cynthia Omololu

Cynthia Omololu (or is it C.J.? Or Cynthia Jaynes? So many choices!) is the author of the new novel, Dirty Little Secrets. This book has a lovely teenager on the cover with sexy, puffy lips, a new trend in YA. Where do they find all of these girls with puffy lips? How do they get their jobs as book cover starlets? The answer to questions other than these can be found at Cynthia's website.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Cynthia Omololu!

1. What is your favorite word?
Thanks.

2. What is your least favorite word?
Hate.

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
My favorite song - whichever one that is at the moment.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
When I wake up in the middle of the night obsessively worrying about
something stupid. It's never that bad in the morning.

5. What sound or noise do you love?
My kids coming through the door after school.

6. What sound or noise do you hate?
The dog howling when my son plays the trumpet.

7. What is your favorite curse word?
Damnable. Unfortunately, you had to say it in the 19th century to not look
like an ass.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
CSI investigator, but only like it is on TV.

9. What profession would you not like to do?
Social worker. Everyday heartbreak.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at
the Pearly Gates?
Dangit, we grabbed the wrong list again - you really have thirty more years.
Oh, and because we messed up the body you had, we're going to have to give
you this one. It's only 28 years old, but still in good shape.

Next week's author: Jessica Leader!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Amy Brecount White!

Amy Brecount White's debut novel, Forget-Her-Nots, drops (ha! I sound like such a tool when I use that word. So I shall use it as oft as possible) March 2. Her website has a very handy list of the meanings of flowers from the book. I give you basil! Figure it out!

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Amy Brecount White!

1. What is your favorite word? serendipity
2. What is your least favorite word? sucks
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? The scent of flowers. Muffins baking. Cool mountain air.
4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Loud noises. Discord. Icky smells.
5. What sound or noise do you love? A silvery flute.
6. What sound or noise do you hate? My kids fighting.
7. What is your favorite curse word? Merde.
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? I'd love to run a flower conservatory with a bookstore and coffee shop!
9. What profession would you not like to do? Politician. I need my down time.
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? I just want a smile.

Next week's author: Cynthia Omololu!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Kimberly Pauley

Kimberly Pauley is a YA author (Sucks to Be Me and the forthcoming Still Sucks to Be Me), though she is perhaps better known as the YA Books Goodess from YA Books Central. You can learn more than you ever wanted to learn about her at www.kimberlypauley.com

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French. And, once again, the spacing and stuff is all weird.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Kimberly Pauley!

1. What is your favorite word?

Epiphany (though, you know, this changes all the time.)

2. What is your least favorite word?

No.

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

Random Connections.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

Stupidity.

5. What sound or noise do you love?

Little Max giggling.

6. What sound or noise do you hate?

That awful beep beep beep sound that construction vehicles make when they back up.

7. What is your favorite curse word?

Um, probably "Dammit!" Sometimes followed by "Janet"

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?

Artist. Any kind, really.

9. What profession would you not like to do?

Anything corporate. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt, hated it.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

You know, you were right. (Then God would poke me on the nose with his/her finger and giggle.)

Next week is Thanksgiving, so we'll skip the Proust. Until the next week!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Nina Hess!

Nina Hess and I met years back when I was doing some freelance writing about reluctant readers. We hit it off famously and have been buds ever since. I wish I could see her more than less than once a year (or whenever we happen to be at a conference at the same time). Nina will be my guest of honor when Rupert Grint invites me back to his lair, I mean, to Hogwarts. Nina is the author of the most excellent A Practical Guide to Monsters, as well as an editor extraordinaire. Read all about her monsters here.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French. And, once again, the spacing and stuff is all weird.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Nina Hess!

1. What is your favorite word? I can’t pick just one so I will say: Thesaurus

2. What is your least favorite word? No

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Smart, funny open-minded people and great books

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Negativity

5. What sound or noise do you love? Silence

6. What sound or noise do you hate? Loud clangy music in public places

7. What is your favorite curse word? Poo!

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Elementary school teacher in a place that actually pays a living wage for teachers

9. What profession would you not like to do? Accountant

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? Go home!

Next Thursday's author: Kimberly Pauley!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Jill S. Alexander!

Jill S. Alexander is the author of the delightful THE SWEETHEART OF PROSPER COUNTY. I say delightful, although I have not yet read the book (I will! I swear it! I'm a school librarian and am always 2-3 season behind in my reading. But I promise I will!), because the cover is delightful and Jill herself seems delightful. Enough of that word. She has a great looking website, jillsalexander.com, and a wonky blog (her word, not mine) called "Welcome to the Wonky Tonk," where she muses often about Southern things. I look forward to reading more and hearing more from Jill. (if she ever speaks to me again. I was being sincere about wanting and planning to read the book.)

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Jill S. Alexander!

1. What is your favorite word?
Swanky

2. What is your least favorite word?
Booyah! Time to stop with the BOOYAHS, folks.

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Music inpsires me.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Whining. I don’t do whining.

5. What sound or noise do you love?
I absolutely love the sexy rumble of a ’69 Mustang Boss 429 engine.

6. What sound or noise do you hate?
The monotonous drone of a treadmill.

7. What is your favorite curse word?
Ri-damn-diculous

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
In my dreams, I teach country and western dancing. Two-step, Waltz, Swing, The Slide, line-dancing – the whole HonkyTonk package.

9. What profession would you not like to do?
Chris Brown’s publicist

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
You hear that? That’s your grandfather leading the Hallelujah Gloryland Full-on Gospel Choir, and he’s been expecting you.

Next Thursday's author: Nina Hess!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Josh Berk

Josh Berk is the author of the upcoming novel, The Dark Days of Hamburger Halpin. That's how we met, actually, cause I was all like, that's really close to my name! And he was all, are you a fat, deaf guy? And I was all, say what? Then he interviewed me. He is also the star of the hit sitcom "Berkin' It Up." His book does not come out until February 9, but until then you can enjoy his Berkness at joshberkbooks.com.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Josh Berk!

1. What is your favorite word?

My favorite word in any language is tush (also tushie, or the proper Yiddish "tuches").

2. What is your least favorite word?
Blogosphere.

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

I am constantly inspired by the dada-ist sensibility that the only logical response to the hypocrisy of society is a furious burst of laughter. Also fart jokes.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Pretentiousness.

5. What sound or noise do you love?
I believe that the sound of an electric guitar, fuzzed out with distortion and amplified very loud, is the most beautiful sound in the world. Magical even.

6. What sound or noise do you hate?
Laugh tracks piss me off.

7. What is your favorite curse word?
I use all the regular English ones far too often, but again I have to go with the Yiddish. So many to choose from! Putz is good, but schmuck is probably my absolute favorite. All the best curse words have that angry "k" sound.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?

I often think I'd like to be a doctor, until I think of the approximately 45,000 reasons why I'd be a terrible doctor (such as I don't like touching people and am afraid of blood). Being in a band was something I used to be sort of good at and I loved very much, so I'm going to go out on a wild limb and say rock star.

9. What profession would you not like to do?
Anything to do with the military. I have a moral objection to violence in most cases, but also I hate getting up early and suck at push-ups.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

Hot wings half off? Or maybe: "You did all right, son." Then God would give me a noogie and I'd punch him in the arm and we'd wrestle a bit. And then eat some wings.


Next Thursday's author: Jill S. Alexander!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Kristina Springer

Kristina Springer is the adorable author of the new release, The Esspressologist. I shared a cab with her and Margarita Engle this past summer at ALA. We probed Margarita about what it was like to have a million golden awards covering her book. Kristina has a beautiful and bubbly website, kristinaspringer.com. And she has four kids! Way to go! Must be all the coffee.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Kristina Springer!

1. What is your favorite word? love
2. What is your least favorite word? poop
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Quiet (because I don’t get a lot of it) and meet ups with other writers usually gets me recharged.
4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Chaos and a calendar that’s way overfilled.
5. What sound or noise do you love? My kids laughing.
6. What sound or noise do you hate? When all four kids are screaming at the same time. OMG. It’s loud.
7. What is your favorite curse word? Shit. But I don’t really curse too much. Trying to be good in front of the kids!
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Talk show host.
9. What profession would you not like to do? Politician.
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? The chocolate river is on your left, that giant cappuccino fountain over there never turns off, and oh, did I mention there are no calories here? :-)

Next Thursday's author: Josh Berk!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Carol Lynch Williams!

Carol Lynch Williams is the author of the chilling The Chosen One about a girl living in a polygamist compound. You will never look at a book mobile in the same way. Interesting fact #1: Carol's new website is about to be up and running, so look out for that. Interesting Fact #2: My book group is discussing The Chosen One today. Therefore, I proclaim today Carol Lynch Williams Day! Please do not celebrate by marrying multiple people.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Carol Lynch Williams! (for some reason the formatting is a little weird from my cut and paste)

1. What is your favorite word? Hmmm. I’ve always loved the word gurgle. It just sounds nice. It’s baby-ish, don’t you think? Unless someone was gurgling out a last breath. Or gurgling up blood. Then I wouldn’t like the word as much.

2. What is your least favorite word? I’m not one much for swearing. There is one word I hate so much that I don’t want to even put initials to it. I’ll give you a hint—it’s not the Eff word.

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Something that touches me emotionally can make me want to write. It doesn’t matter the emotion. I might be laughing my butt off and think, hey, this would make a great scene. When I heard about a young girl whose father was trying to get her to marry her own uncle (his brother) it made me so angry I knew that I would write about that. Several years later, I started my novel The Chosen One.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally? When I’m feeling down about something. Then I just feel like eating something yummy or watching movies. Or both.

5. What sound or noise do you love? Babies laughing or talking.

6. What sound or noise do you hate? People (especially children) crying out in pain. That just sickens me. I can’t even think of that.

7. What is your favorite curse word? I’m not much of a curser. So maybe I would choose damnhell. For best effect, you must say this quickly. And, like, three times in a row.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Oh, this is good. I’d love to sing professionally. I think I could have been a Country singer. And I would write my own songs. One song would go like this:

Gimme what I want, bay-bee.

Gimme what I need.

Help me plant the crops outside

Help me get to the weed (FYI—to the reader—or listener, if this song goes big. I do NOT mean pot [marijuana], but weeds like those bushes that have pricklies on them and spread really fast.)

So what if I love diamonds

Mercedes, good chocolate, fine steaks.

That just means I’m a fancy girl

Who’s finally gotten a break

So gimme what I want, bay-bee

Gimme what I need

And if you’re smart (and rich and wise and funny and good looking)

I’ll let you in my ol’ heeeaaart!

BTW, I just made that song up, right on the spot. As you can see, I'm a natural.

I’d also like to be the librarian who just has to read for her job and show people terrific books. Or a dancer.

9. What profession would you not like to do? Anything math-ish. Eeew.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? Oh, I so believe heaven exists. So I guess I’d love to hear God say, ‘Well done, thou good and faithful servant.’ Then He would give me a big hug and say, ‘Where are all your daughters?’

Next Thursday's author: Kristina Springer!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Jay Asher!

Jay Asher is the author of the sad, suspenseful, compelling and addictive read, THIRTEEN REASONS WHY. The audiobook for this is fantastic, and the book completely lends itself to being listened to (since half of the book is a boy listening to the tapes of a deceased girl). Jay is one of the authors appearing at the NCTE conference this fall, where I will also appear (doesn't that make us sound like magicians? Or not.). Follow Jay's blog here.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Jay Asher!

1. What is your favorite word?
cottage

2. What is your least favorite word?
onion

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
kindness (especially when it's uncalled for)

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
unnecessary rudeness (yes, sometimes it is necessary)

5. What sound or noise do you love?
my wife laughing

6. What sound or noise do you hate?
cars skidding to a stop

7. What is your favorite curse word?
fart (saying it just makes you feel better immediately)

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
I would love to write and illustrate a daily comic strip!

9. What profession would you not like to do?
accountant

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
"I'll sign your book if you'll sign mine."

Next Thursday's author: Carol Lynch Williams!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Jill Wolfson!

Jill Wolfson is the author of several award-winning novels, including What I Call Life; Home, and Other Big, Fat Lies; and her newest book, Cold Hands, Warm Heart, the summary of which begins, "Dani was born with her heart on the wrong side of her body." How can you not want to read this book? And remember that cartoon about the boy whose organs were on the outside of his body? I wonder if he ever paid a visit to the Indiana Sand Dunes. But I digress... Visit Jill on the web at jillwolfson.com.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Jill Wolfson!

1. What is your favorite word?
Right now, it’s “absquatulate.” I love the sound of it and its whimsical origins. It dates to the American Midwest in the 1800s when people were coining lots of these funny-sounding, pseudo-Latin, high-sounding words, like skedaddle and discombobulate. Absquatulate means to depart in a hurry and probably brings together the prefix ab-, "away from," with a base of squat – to sit. Very creative. Okay, I’m going to absquatulate from this question now. On to the next!

2. What is your least favorite word?
Pustule. I have no particular aversion to medical terminology. I love psoriasis and cadaver, for example. But pustule makes me cringe.
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Being in tune with the belly laugh at the center of the universe.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Anything done purely for cash or fame.

5. What sound or noise do you love? Silence.

6. What sound or noise do you hate? Too much silence. My own thoughts drive me crazy. Turn up the music!

7. What is your favorite curse word? Kish mir in tuchis. (Kiss my ass in Yiddish). I heard it my entire childhood.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Captain of an intergalactic space craft

9. What profession would you not like to do? President of any country existing today

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
"Thank goodness, you finally understood what I was trying to tell you! It took long enough."

Next Thursday's author: Jay Asher!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Billy Bones/Christopher Lincoln!

Christopher Lincoln is the author of the new middle grade series Billy Bones, about a skeleton living in a closet. I have not read the books yet, but they look delightful and thoughtfully designed (which is probably due to the fact that Christopher is an art director. Perhaps. I'm just guessing.). I am facebook pals with Billy Bones, but the questionnaire below was filled out by Christopher, so I was a little confused as to who I should say is the special guest. Visit Chris and Billy on the web at chrislincoln.org/ (and now I'm even more flummoxed-- is Chris a human or an organization? The mysteries continue!)

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present-- Billy Bones (or Chris Lincoln-- I'm not sure! I know I could have just emailed him to clear all this up, but I think it's more fun and mysterious not to know)!

Filled out by Christopher Lincoln (the man who types up my stories).

1. What is your favorite word?

Codswallop

2. What is your least favorite word?

Can’t

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

Most anything that is creative, spiritual, or emotional. Oh, and funny, too.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

Very serious things like accounting.

5. What sound or noise do you love?

Sound effects from Don Martin cartoon strips.

6. What sound or noise do you hate?

Screeching metal and angry people.

7. What is your favorite curse word?

BLAST!

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?

Fulltime author would be great. I’m an advertising art director at the moment.

9. What profession would you not like to do?

Politician. I’m a bit too shy for that.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

You’re in!

Next Thursday's author: Jill Wolfson!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Janette Rallison!

Janette Rallison is the author of nine books for teenagers, three of which have been chosen for the IRA Young Adults' Choices List. Her latest books are My Fair Godmother and Just One Wish. Janette lives in Chandler, Arizona with her husband, five children and enough cats to classify her as "an eccentric cat lady." She did not do this on purpose. (The cats, that is; she had the children on purpose.) You can visit with Janette at www.janetterallison.com.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present-- Janette Rallison!

1. What is your favorite word?

That depends if you mean to hear or to write or to say. To hear: Yes. (when I ask my kids if they did their jobs, when I ask my editor if he liked my latest manuscript—it just works so well in so many arenas.) To write: Just. I write it way too much and have to go through my manuscript de-just-ifying it. Oh look, there it is in the beginning of this answer. To say: my husband’s name, because it means he’s near.

2. What is your least favorite word?

No. We all hear it far too often in life.

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

Being around other people who are upbeat, creative, and charged. Also, taking walks by myself.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

Getting my editor’s revision letters. I usually decide to quit writing and raise ponies every time I see his stack of comments.

5. What sound or noise do you love?

The sound of my kids getting along together.

6. What sound or noise do you hate?

The sound of my kids fighting. (Wow, I’m beginning to sound like my mother. How did that happen?)

7. What is your favorite curse word?
Crap, if that counts as a curse word.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?

I always wanted to be an actress, but I thought it was too impractical, so I became a writer instead. If you are a sensible person, you should be laughing at that statement, because being a writer is as impractical as being an actress—I just didn’t know any better. Sometimes ignorance can help you in life.

9. What profession would you not like to do?

Food service. Been there and done that and still remember what it felt like to rush around a restaurant making sure everyone’s water glasses were full.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

You did everything you were supposed to do.

Next Thursday's author: Billy Bones!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Brian James

Brian James is the author of numerous children's books, including the Pirate School series and the Catkid series. He's also the author of several YA novels: Pure Sunshine, Tomorrow, Maybe, Perfect World, Dirty Liar, Thief, Zombie Blondes, and The Heights. Mr. James has the envious ability to summon ice cream trucks at will. Visit him on the web at http://brianjamestheauthor.blogspot.com/.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present-- Brian James!

1. What is your favorite word?
soft

2. What is your least favorite word?
I love all words

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
strangers' faces

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
self-doubt

5. What sound or noise do you love?
rain

6. What sound or noise do you hate?
wounded animal cries

7. What is your favorite curse word?
fuck

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
teaching

9. What profession would you not like to do?
gardener

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
"Now you are free to do whatever you wish"

Next Thursday's author: Janette Rallison!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Yvonne Prinz

Yvonne Prinz is a very sweet facebook friend of mine who has three novels under her belt and an upcoming rock epic (um, I just made that up, but I think it might be correct) called The Vinyl Princess. In fact, her Proust questionnaire was actually answered by The Vinyl Princess! So I'll let her introduce herself:

"My Name is The Vinyl Princess. I collect Vinyl records obsessively and listen to music almost all the time. My book will be out in December (Harper Collins) buy it, you’ll laugh." Read her blog at http://vinylprincess.blogspot.com/

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present-- The Vinyl Princess!

1. What is your favorite word?

Vinyl

2. What is your least favorite word?

MP3 (is that a word?)

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

Music is my food, my religion, my life.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

Christians with a “Message”

5. What sound or noise do you love?

A back beat, a nicely played guitar solo, that crackly sound a record makes when it gets to the end.

6. What sound or noise do you hate?

Angels singing.

7. What is your favorite curse word?

I like Asshole a lot. It always seems to get the job done.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?

I’d like to attempt rock star but I doubt I’d be good at it. I’m nervous in crowds and I start to stutter like an auctioneer.

9. What profession would you not like to do?

Anything that requires a desk and a chair. If I had to do something like that I’d go out the window.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

“Keep Moving…”

Next Thursday's author: Brian James!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Andrew Smith

Andrew Smith is a fellow Feiwel and Friends family member. He writes a book pretty much every time he poops (um, I guess that would mean he poops kind of infrequently, but I mean he writes A LOT). His first novel, Ghost Medicine, was named a BBYA of 2009, and his second novel, the intense in the path of falling objects, arrives in bookstores on 9/9/09. He also likes to discuss boys and books. A LOT. My daughter warmed up to him immediately, so he is most definitely a decent guy. Look for a million other novels by him in the next year or two. And check out his website and blog at ghostmedicine.com.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present-- Andrew Smith

1. What is your favorite word?

Bloviation

2. What is your least favorite word?

Scrotum. If I had my way, the word would be eradicated from every English lexicon and replaced with "ballsack."

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

Travel. Going places I've never been. Especially places where I don't speak the language.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

Apostrophe misuse.

5. What sound or noise do you love?

Letting go of the mouth on a filled balloon.

6. What sound or noise do you hate?

When the pilot of the airplane I'm on says, "Holy shit! I fucked up!"

7. What is your favorite curse word?

I can't begin to tell you just how much I love the word "douchebag" Well, "fucking douchebag," actually. But neither one of those answers is actually a word, according to my spellcheck. Spellcheck isn't a word, for that matter, either. Douchebag spellcheck.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?

The guy who runs the body scanner machine at the airport.

9. What profession would you not like to do?

Undersea welder.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

You again? I'm going to give you one more try to get it right.

PS -- If anyone else picked "douchebag" for #7, then I'll be pissed. It is MY favorite word.

Next Thursday's author: Yvonne Prinz!

Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Tamora Pierce!

Tamora Pierce is the goddess of young adult fantasy literature. I have spent countless hours with her characters in Tortall, and once had a student who used her books as security blankets, checking several out per day just to carry around the school. Tamora is currently working on MASTIFF, the end of the Beka Cooper trilogy, and on a collection of short stories for Random House. And she has her own Cafepress store! You can visit Tamora on the web at tamorapierce.com.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so as Tamora("aka the Pottymouth of Full Cast Audio") says-- Brace yourself!

Ladies and gentlemen, I present-- Tamora Pierce!

1. What is your favorite word?
Portents.

2. What is your least favorite word?
accounting

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Nature and music

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Loud-mouthed bullies and drunks.

5. What sound or noise do you love?
The wind in the trees or a cat's purr.

6. What sound or noise do you hate?
Voices raised in fury.

7. What is your favorite curse word?
Fuck.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Editing.

9. What profession would you not like to do?
Stoop labor.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
"Ya done good, kid."

Next Thursday's author: Andrew Smith!

Proust Questionnaire Friday! Today's Special Guest: Barry Lyga!

A fellow comic lover, Barry Lyga is the fabulous author of YA faves The Astonishing Adventures of Fanboy and Goth Girl, Boy Toy, Hero-Type, and the upcoming Astonishing Adventures sequel, Goth Girl Rising. And he was was responsible for spearheading and developing Free Comic Book Day! Who knew? (Uh, those of you who read his online bio, probably). You can visit Barry on the web at barrylyga.com.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present-- Barry Lyga!

1. What is your favorite word? Coruscate
2. What is your least favorite word? No
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Hidden connections between elements, ideas, people
4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Predictability
5. What sound or noise do you love? Rain on the roof
6. What sound or noise do you hate? A baby crying
7. What is your favorite curse word? Fuck
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Videogame designer/programmer
9. What profession would you not like to do? Anything that involves the words "cubicle" or "manager" or "necktie"
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? "Dude, don't worry about that agnostic stuff -- we're good."

Next week's author: Tamora Pierce!

Proust Questionnaire Friday! Today's Special Guest: Ellen Wittlinger!

I blogged yesterday and said that there were less than two days until our first author questionnaire, which was technically true, but completely off. I think I thought it was Wednesday when I wrote that, but goodie for you because it's already Friday! First, though, I would like to congratulate the winner of the Get Well Soon audiobok contest, janetfaye! Happy listening, janetfaye!

Now, on to the questions.


Ellen Wittlinger is by far one of favorite YA authors. Her stories and characters stay with me long after I finish her books, which says a lot since I tend to expel book memories like gas (excuse me). Her newest book is Love & Lies: Marisol's Story which is a follow-up to Hard Love, a Printz Honor and Lambda Award winner. You can visit Ellen on the web at ellenwittlinger.com.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present-- Ellen Wittlinger!

1. What is your favorite word? puppy
2. What is your least favorite word? should
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? art of all kinds
4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally? high humidity
5. What sound or noise do you love? my children singing
6. What sound or noise do you hate? sirens
7. What is your favorite curse word? Shit!
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? photographer or actor
9. What profession would you not like to do? minister
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? "I saw you on Oprah!"

Next week's author: Barry Lyga! (I'm going boy girl, see?)

YA Author Friday Questions!

I declare a new feature: YA Authors answer the ten questions of the Proust Questionnaire, aka the questions James Lipton asks on Inside the Actors Studio. I'm going to try and have a different author featured each Friday. So far I have one taker. I shall start with my own answers, and, dear reader, feel free to answer the questions below in the comments section! [Side note: I deleted all of the "labels" that I had throughout my blog because they wouldn't link. I added a search bar at the top of the blog, so you can go back and search for things if you wish.]

1. What is your favorite word? Toilet. At least when I'm playing Madlibs.
2. What is your least favorite word? Incompetence.
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Sincerity.
4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Hipsters.
5. What sound or noise do you love? My daughter farting in her crib in the morning.
6. What sound or noise do you hate? Fire alarms in schools.
7. What is your favorite curse word? Turd.
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Travel agent or hair stylist.
9. What profession would you not like to do? Doctor.
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? Nothing will be difficult from now on.

Look for another YA author's answers next Friday!