Proust Questionnaire Thursday! Today's Special Guest: Carol Lynch Williams!

Carol Lynch Williams is the author of the chilling The Chosen One about a girl living in a polygamist compound. You will never look at a book mobile in the same way. Interesting fact #1: Carol's new website is about to be up and running, so look out for that. Interesting Fact #2: My book group is discussing The Chosen One today. Therefore, I proclaim today Carol Lynch Williams Day! Please do not celebrate by marrying multiple people.

The following questions are based on James Lipton's questions from Inside the Actors Studio, which, in turn, are based on the Proust Questionnaire. One of the questions is about swearing, so please excuse our French.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Carol Lynch Williams! (for some reason the formatting is a little weird from my cut and paste)

1. What is your favorite word? Hmmm. I’ve always loved the word gurgle. It just sounds nice. It’s baby-ish, don’t you think? Unless someone was gurgling out a last breath. Or gurgling up blood. Then I wouldn’t like the word as much.

2. What is your least favorite word? I’m not one much for swearing. There is one word I hate so much that I don’t want to even put initials to it. I’ll give you a hint—it’s not the Eff word.

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Something that touches me emotionally can make me want to write. It doesn’t matter the emotion. I might be laughing my butt off and think, hey, this would make a great scene. When I heard about a young girl whose father was trying to get her to marry her own uncle (his brother) it made me so angry I knew that I would write about that. Several years later, I started my novel The Chosen One.

4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally? When I’m feeling down about something. Then I just feel like eating something yummy or watching movies. Or both.

5. What sound or noise do you love? Babies laughing or talking.

6. What sound or noise do you hate? People (especially children) crying out in pain. That just sickens me. I can’t even think of that.

7. What is your favorite curse word? I’m not much of a curser. So maybe I would choose damnhell. For best effect, you must say this quickly. And, like, three times in a row.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Oh, this is good. I’d love to sing professionally. I think I could have been a Country singer. And I would write my own songs. One song would go like this:

Gimme what I want, bay-bee.

Gimme what I need.

Help me plant the crops outside

Help me get to the weed (FYI—to the reader—or listener, if this song goes big. I do NOT mean pot [marijuana], but weeds like those bushes that have pricklies on them and spread really fast.)

So what if I love diamonds

Mercedes, good chocolate, fine steaks.

That just means I’m a fancy girl

Who’s finally gotten a break

So gimme what I want, bay-bee

Gimme what I need

And if you’re smart (and rich and wise and funny and good looking)

I’ll let you in my ol’ heeeaaart!

BTW, I just made that song up, right on the spot. As you can see, I'm a natural.

I’d also like to be the librarian who just has to read for her job and show people terrific books. Or a dancer.

9. What profession would you not like to do? Anything math-ish. Eeew.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? Oh, I so believe heaven exists. So I guess I’d love to hear God say, ‘Well done, thou good and faithful servant.’ Then He would give me a big hug and say, ‘Where are all your daughters?’

Next Thursday's author: Kristina Springer!